Do you have a vulnerability hangover?

 

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There’s a little-known side-effect to sharing your story that not a lot of people talk about — so let’s talk about it! 

For a lot of people, the idea of having other people look at them, hear them, and observe them is truly unnerving. Think back to your school years, the courage it took sometimes to raise your hand in class and answer a question. All of the other students in the classroom would turn and look at you while you spoke. 

Or, if you ever had to get up in front of the classroom to make a presentation — you likely felt like a ball of nerves.

As we grow up, that stuff doesn’t necessarily go away — it just manifests into a whole different type fear and feeling. I call it a Vulnerability Hangover. 

Part of learning how to share your story is learning...

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Don't Try to Boil the Ocean

 

I heard an expression last week I’d never heard before… and it’s one that keeps boiling to the surface, so to speak, in a way that’s captured my attention.

As I mentioned yesterday on this flash briefing, I hosted my first LIVE event in Dallas this past weekend…. and all last week, leading up to the event, I was a buzz with activity, trying to make all of the last-minute arrangements and take care of details.

Every Thursday, I do a FB live interview called Bright lights — and the women I was interviewing, Susan McCuistion, was sharing her ideas behind her social campaign called StandFor … which is all about focusing on the things we stand FOR rather than the things we stand against.

She was talking about how often times, we get so intent on standing against something …. like standing against discrimination…. standing against war…. standing against hate…. that what we end up doing is calling in more of...

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Turn On Your Flashlight

 

 

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I’m coming off a huge weekend high, as I launched and hosted my first LIVE event in Dallas Texas on Saturday — the first Storytelling Symposium to empower women.

4 other Speakers joined me for the half-day workshop, as we poured into the audience our best advice, tips, and inspiration to help them step more fully into their own story — and use it to shine a light into the world.

I shared with the audience a vision I had recently while meditating at a women’s retreat I attended last month.

The meditation had me imagining a golden light shining down on top of me. I immediately saw this light in my minds eye, and could see myself as a dark shadow under this golden light.

And in that moment, I heard a click — and it was as if I turned on a flashlight. Suddenly, the dark shadow was gone and below that big golden...

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What does the Lion say to You?

empowerment Apr 19, 2019

Every week inside the LIGHTbeamers Community (our private FB group),
I post a picture that is aimed to prompt the members to tell a piece of their own story. The idea is to let the image spark ideas and creativity, mining a story the picture seems to tell.

This week, the picture was of a lion… a close up of just her face. Her eyes staring straight at the audience, looking deep into the eyes of her beholder.

I asked the Community to share what they felt like the Lion was saying to them when the looked at the photo.


One of the women in the Community shared these words —

"And just like the Lion, she didn’t concern herself with the opinion of others. She was created to be bold and fierce and so she settled into her own skin and let that truth sink into her bones. So she stood tall with her face to the wind and claimed her place in this world. She had been given a voice that would not be quieted in the face of fear."

This practice of using imagery and...

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Stop Drinking the Dirty Water

 

Listen to our daily blog-casts on Amazon. Enable our "What's Your Story" daily flash briefing and listen using your Alexa device! 

If I handed you a glass full of dirty water, would you drink it??

My guess is most of you — actually, I hope all of you — would say, “No way, April” …
For the record, I wouldn’t either.

Hold this thought for a minute of dirty water, because it’s a really great visual for the storytelling concept I want to share with you.

I talk to women on a daily basis — women I’m interviewing, women inside my Community, my private clients… and as we talk about their story, at some point or another we have to address the dirty water — which represents the negative thoughts they are filling their mind.

Thoughts like — "my story isn’t good enough."

"No one will care, they don’t want to listen to me share my story."

"My story is boring/not important/not...

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The LIGHT of Lucy

For more than 20 years now, I’ve been interviewing people as part of my work as a video producer, writer, and journalist. I always consider it a great privilege and honor when people accept my invitation for the interview, and proceed to answer the questions I ask…

Ultimately, this leads to them sharing their story with me — and there’s always this magical moment that happens at some point inside the interview… it’s like a chime that goes off in my head…. a little bell rings to signal that moment when we’ve hit our target. I’ve uncovered a golden piece of their story.

This happened yesterday when I was interviewing my guest on the Bright Light’s Storytelling Series—  a weekly Facebook Live interview I do on Thursdays.

I was interviewing Lucy Brummett, a writer and blogger who went from being riddled with insecurity and self-doubt…. to stepping out as a writer & bloggers to be seen and heard....

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The Story in Your Head

 

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There are 2 different kinds of stories; There’s the real story of what you really want to get out into the world…. then there’s another story that’s holding you back.

This 2nd story is the one that plays in your head and plays dirty tricks on you. It tells you things in order to hold you back and keep you from sharing the first story….. the one that matters.

The story that’s playing in your head is background noise and sometimes it gets really, really loud.

Do you know what I’m talking about?

That story usually sounds something like this:

“What will others think?”

“My story isn’t good enough”

“Nobody will listen”

“My story is boring”

“It’s a jumbled up mess in my head, I wouldn’t even know where to begin”

“People will think...

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The Vulnerability Hangover

 


There’s a little-known side-effect to sharing your story that not a lot of people talk about — so let’s talk about it!

For a lot of people, the idea of having other people look at them, hear them, and observe them is truly unnerving. Think back to your school years, and the courage it took sometimes to raise your hand in class and answer a question. All of the other students in the classroom would turn and look at you while you spoke. 

Or, if you ever had to get up in front of the classroom to make a presentation — the nerves you likely felt, by having so many people look at you, hear you, and witness you.

As we grow up, that stuff doesn’t necessarily go away — it just manifests into a whole different fear and feeling. I call it the Vulnerability Hangover.

Part of learning how to share your story is learning how to deal with the aftermath of feelings — feeling naked and exposed, feeling raw and tender. When you first get up...

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MLK's Dream Sparks the Story

 

I can’t help but think about the power of Story today, as we celebrate and honor the legacy of Martin Luther King, Jr.

Here was a man so passionate for civil rights, he rose above adversity and used his voice to openly share his story as a means to blaze the trail for all of his brothers and sisters.

It’s awe-inspiring to think about the journey of Martin Luther King, Jr and how powerful his legacy is to this day.

Can you imagine if he had let all the doubts in his head keep him quiet??

I hear some of the same things over and over from amazing women who tell me they are scared to share their story —

Things like, “What will other people think?  What if they think I’m trying to be somebody special? What if my story falls flat, and it’s not exciting enough?" 

Some of these same thoughts probably went through MLK's head at some point.... Can you imagine if Martin Luther King, Jr had let that fear get to him?

Now, I know...

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